Cultivating Compassion by Trading Assumptions for Curiosity
Many of us spend much more time making assumptions than being curious.
To some degree, we have to. We wouldn't get much done without making certain assumptions based on past experiences.
But when we consistently assume what others think, feel, or experience, or we pressure ourselves to be a certain way based on what we think is expected of us, we close ourselves off from connection.
I just read a story in which the two main characters spend years swapping bodies. One day, they both wake up with the same personalities, but in each other's bodies. At first, it lasts only a few hours at a time. Later, it's days, then weeks. They have no control over when it happens.
In the beginning, they know each other but don't like each other. What they lack is understanding.
One is a quiet young man. The other is a gregarious young woman. One’s a rule follower, the other a rule breaker. One has an imperfect but loving family. The other is estranged from their father, who killed their mother in a tragic drunk driving accident.
Despite their differences, they have many things in common, including similar inner struggles.
By the end of the story, they're back in their own bodies. But spending so much time seeing the world through each other's eyes leaves them with deeper compassion for each other, themselves, and even the people around them.
One of July's angel cards is Compassion.
Imagine what we could learn by approaching ourselves and others with more compassion.
To do that, we have to interrupt our assumptions.
Notice the stories you tell yourself about who you “should” be. Where did they come from? Do they even align with your values?
Notice when you jump to conclusions about something someone else said or did—or even who they are. What changes when you’re curious instead?
Assumptions can make us feel in control, like we have all the answers.
Openness and compassion require vulnerability, but they build resilience, purpose, and connection.
Remember this month's Compassion affirmation: I recognize myself in others and others in myself.
What would be possible if you challenged just one assumption today with curiosity?